GARDENS at Chelsea Flower Show this year include outdoor kitchens – wood burning ovens, sinks, even a fridge.

Are we mad? Have they not realised this is Britain and that we’re still waiting for a decent spring, let alone summer.

Or, as a friend once said, at a very soggy barbecue: “Indoors, we have a nice, warm, dry kitchen with a state-of-the-art cooker... so why am I out here, in the mud, grilling sausages in the rain?”

Mad dogs and Englishmen used to be famous for going out in the midday sun. Cooking in the midday rain is possibly even more bonkers.

Enjoy the bank holiday. PLANNING a wedding? Then spare a thought for the mother of the teenage bride in an ultra-Orthodox Jewish wedding in Jerusalem recently., where there were 25,000 guests.

Yes, 25,000. So many that those at the back had to use binoculars to see the bride.

Just imagine the bill for the reception.

On the other hand, there must have been quite a decent haul of presents...

There again, by the time they get to their silver wedding, they’ll probably still be writing their thank you letters.